Balds of the World

Be proud of your shiny bald head! Choose your category when you join to declare your baldness style.



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The Rhino

Baldness and the beast. The Rhino is a distant cousin of the oxbow lake, where the owner has baldness forming around a tuft (or horn) of hair based at the front of the head.

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The Monastric Retreat

A truly religious experience. The monastic retreat is characterised by a lack of hair on the crown of the head, leading to a friar-tuck look. Although Holy by name this is often seen as the Shaulin-Monk of hair loss as it sneaks up on you from behind and catches you unaware.

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The Dom

Dedicated to our patron saint of hair loss Mr Dominic Byrne. Similar to the 8 ball, the Dom utilises facial hair to compensate for a loss up top. Total baldness accentuated by a short beard around the mouth. Dominic we salute you.

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El classico

Hair loss in its purest form. Otherwise known as the long back & sides, El classico gives you a shiny top with wraparound hair covering the back & sides.

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The Oxbow lake

A recession lovers dream, this can be monitored over time and will often lead to other styles. When the hair starts to recede either side of the centre, at one point these two shiny rivers will meet at the back creating a perfect oxbow lake.

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The Combover

A classic bit of misdirection. Tucking in your shiny patch under a blanket of hair combed from the side of the head for warmth and protection. The thickness of the combover can differ greatly leading to varying levels of success.

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The 8-Ball

A thing of shiny beauty, often seen as the ultimate sign of acceptance. The owner has realised their fate and has beaten mother nature to the punch by shaving off all their head hair.

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The sister in law

Just because you can, doesn't mean you should. A relative of the combover, the sister in law involves combing hair from the back of the head in order to cover your shiny patch. This can be tricky and may involve a large amount of hair product in order to maintain stability. Hair can be utilised from any part of your body for this one including the neck, back and crack if length allows!

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